Dirty Poems, latest short funny dirty poems

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Dirty Poems

Sitting on my lazy arse
I drift into a daydream,
Thinking 'bout you fully smothered
From head to toe in chocolate cream.

I get this thought every day and night
And wonder when it would stop.
But I can't help thinking what it'll be like
If there was a cherry placed on top!

*****************

I want to kiss you,
I want to hug you tight.

Let's feel each other,
And make love all night.

*****************

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue...
I'm In Love But Not With You...
When We Broke Up You Thought I Cried
But All It Was...
Was Another Guy,
You Told Your Friends That I Was A Trick,
I Told Mine That You Had A Weak Dick...
I Said I Loved You
And You Thought It Was True,
But Guess What Baby?!
You Got Played Too!!

*****************

If sex is dirty
and babies come from sex
then babies must be dirty.
If babies are dirty
and babies become adults
then adults must be dirty.

***************

Let me touch these tities,
Let me kiss this sexy mouth.
Let me lie with you in bed,
Gently gently going south.

***************

A store manager overheard a clerk saying to a customer
"No, ma'am, we haven't had any for some weeks now
and it doesn't look as if we'll be getting any soon.

***************

Dil todh kay chali gai
pholoun kee shahzadi . . . .
Dil todh kay chali gai
pholoun kee shahzadi . . . .
Sali, Kutti, Kameeni, haramzadi

***************

The perfect woman
Doesn't fart
Like a trumpet sounding
But rather it is released
Like she's gently sighing

***************

Twinkle Twinkle little star
You should know what you are
And once you know what you are
Mental hospital is not so far

***************

Rosalina, a pretty young lass
Had a bruly magnificant ass
Not rounded and pink
As you possibly think
It was grey, had long ears, and ate grass

***************

Mental anxiety,
Mental breakdowns,
Menstrual cramps,
Mentalpause
Did you ever notice how
all women's problems begin with.

***************

Mega bites was what my girlfriend did
And gig was a show at night
A ram was a randy man or goat,
Windows just let in the light.

***************

Sex is good
Sex is fine
Doggy Style & 69
Just for fun
Or gettin paid
Everyone likes gettin laid.

***************

If sex is dirty
and babies come from sex
then babies must be dirty.
If babies are dirty
and babies become adults
then adults must be dirty.

***************

A Peach is Peach, A Plum is Plum
A Kiss isn't a Kiss without some tongue
So Open your mouth, Close your eyes
and Give your tongue some exercise.

***************

10 Minutes Of enjoyment 9 Months Of Pain 3 Days In The Hospital A Baby Without A Name The Baby Is A Bastard The Mother Is A Whore This Would a Never Happened If The Rubber Hadn't Tore!

***************

Sex is good Sex is fine Doggy Style & 69 just for fun or getting paid everyone likes getting laid.

***************

***************

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