Rude Valentine Poems

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Rude Valentine Poems

I love you oh so very much Totally, completely From the very top of my head To the bottom of my feetly And another part really loves you If you know what I mean! It's a place..not head nor feet But directly in between

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Roses are red Violets are blue Vodka is cheaper Than dinner for two

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My heart is like a cabbage divided in to two the leaves I give to others the heart I give to you!!!

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Beautiful blonde, brilliant and fair Lovely eyes and mouth in front of all the air Breathe deep my love and pussy cat Breathe deep so your head does not go flat.

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Life if for living Love is for giving You gave me herpes Is love forgiving?

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I said I loved you And you thought it was true, But guess what baby?! You got played too!!

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Out of all the people I've ever met, You're the one who makes me draw Those silly little hearts on my papers. Be my Valentine..you've struck my awe

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like spaghetti Let's get it on

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Sex is bad Sex is a sin Sins are forgiven So stick it in.

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Ohhh baby I get horny, Eat me, Beat me, Bite me, Blow me, Suck me, Fuck me, Very slowly, if you kiss me, don't be sassy, Use your tongue and make it nasty!

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Hearts are red
Clubs are black
come over here
and fill my.....
Roses are red
Carnations are white
I've been to the chemist
how about it tonight!

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I love you baby,
I have really really missed
But all that time you were away,
I was sleeping with your sister!

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Sweet Comic Valentine
U Make Me Smile Wid My Heart

U're Looks Are Laughable,
Unphotographable

Yet U're My Favorite Work Of Art
Is Ur Figure Less dan Greek

Is Ur Mouth A Little Weak
Wen U Open It 2 Speak

Don't Change A Hair 4 Me
Not If U Care 4 Me

Stay Little Valentine Stay
Each Day Iz Valentine's Day

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I said 2 u, "Oh, plz b mine;
B mine 4ever, Valentine."

I mst have seemed like quite a fool,
Although I thought I was bing cool.

I swore dat we would never part,
As I put my hand upon my heart.

Had I been thinking wid my head,
I'd probably have fled instead.

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If I were a key, I would lock u;
If lightning, dan I would shock u

If I were a pier I would dock u;
If I had a band I would rock u.

If I were a spoon, I would feed u;
If I were a house, I would deed u;

On Valentine's Day, I mst plead u,
Valentine, I really need u!

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4 months I've sat & held it in,
It choked inside & hurt like sin.

It made me sweat & steam & stew,
Whenever I caught sight of u.

Thnx goodness Valentine's Day has come;
If I held it longer, it would strike me dumb.

Dis day I'll say it, come rain or shine...
Will u b my Valentine?

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Roses r straight,
Violets r twisted,

Bend over luv,
U're about 2 get fisted.

Roses r crap,
Violets r wanky,

Oooh I've jst come,
Pass me a hanky.

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Another luvr's day passes by my way,
Leaving my soul in undisturbed yearning,

Ones held in my heart r absent these days,
Gone wid my bidding, will I never stop learning?

Long have I witnessed others joining,
As I hold back from da brink of luv,

Possibilities 2 often disappointing,
Thus I remain da untouched dove.

Happy Valentine Day !

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Since my Valentine got a computer,
My luv life has taken a hit.

Nothing I say is important,
Unless it's a byte or a bit.

My life has bcume quite a trial,
Since my Valentine got a computer.

If I want her 2 care about me again,
I guess I'll have 2 reboot her.

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If I am da 1st 2 go
I will wait 4 u in da place
Where da crowns of Angels glow

If I go first bcoz I lost da fight.
I will b waiting wid da Father.
Where da tunnel opens in2 light.

If I am da 1st one dare.
I will await u in lush meadows.
Where heady perfume fills da air.

Happy Valentine Day !

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I miss u terribly dis day of luv,

Miss u wid a wound that stabs & aches..
I see da luv around me, & it takes.
So much strength simply jst 2 move..
Soon, soon, my luv, this waiting will b done.

U & I will have wat we desire..
On days like dis we'll sit beside da fire,
Undoing all da pain of days long gone.

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Rude Valentine Poems

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